Anxiety is a bitch. That horrible feeling can hit your stomach before you’ve even opened your eyes in the morning, swirling around, engaging your fight flight response, preventing you from getting back to sleep. It can be low level, hit you every now and then, maybe when triggered or it could be there all of the time, hitting you in gentle waves. At its worst, it’s all consuming, overwhelming, full of panic and scary.
Pretending that you’re ok is emotionally exhausting and draining. You wear a mask because you don’t want other people knowing how bad you feel, hiding embarrassment. You don’t want to be a burden, or bring people around you down, so you hide away because that feels easier. But you feel lonely and you need company. You compare yourself to others, thinking that everyone else can cope with life, why can’t you. Comparing your insides with other peoples outsides is never a fair comparison. Those masks hide it well.
Your critical mind drives you bonkers, the negativity is draining and your desperate to escape your own brain, the monster inside feels bigger than you.
What people often don’t realise is that everyone has that inner dialogue that constantly talks. If you’re anxious or fearful, having been triggered, that talk is toxic. Its so important to realise that you’re not the voice in your mind. You’re the one who hears, that often meaningless, waste of time and energy, incessant chatter – separate the two. That inner voice is talking to you because you’re not ok and talking releases energy. Its trying to make sense of it by internally verbalising. You have to work hard to not engage and get carried away with the story that your brain constructs. It takes practice but it is possible to quiet that inner dialogue.
I’m pretty sure that if you had a friend who spoke to you the way your inner voice does, you’d have dropped them by now, yet when that voice pipes up, you just accept it as truth and keep on taking it. You have the power to choose not to engage with that voice that is often wrong and spurting absolute perfectionist, rigid, worst case scenario, ‘what if’s’ rubbish.
If this resonates with you and you’d like to work together to beat anxiety, please contact me. You don’t have to live with it. You can learn skills that will help you to manage and find balance. We can teach your body that it doesn’t have to be afraid anymore, no matter what triggered it in the first place. There’s lots you can do to empower yourself and take charge. Change is possible with hard work and practice. Deal with your demons to live a better life.